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Friday, April 08, 2005

Well, it's Going to Boost Attendence 

Hands-down the most ironic story of the year: John Rocker has signed on with the Long Island Ducks of the Independent Atlantic League.

BTW there is no truth to the rumors that batteries will be handed out to the first 5000 fans on opening day.

No, the most ironic story would be "John Rocker has signed with the Seven Train Single Mothers and Queers of the independent Atlantic League."
Here's the Sports Illustrated article that started it all.

"The biggest thing I don't like about New York are the foreigners. I'm not a very big fan of foreigners."

"They turn from the wrong lane. They go 20 miles per hour. It makes me want -- Look! Look at this idiot! I guarantee you she's a Japanese woman. How bad are Asians at driving?"

And the classic:

"It's the most hectic, nerve-racking city. Imagine having to take the [Number] 7 train to the ballpark, looking like you're [riding through] Beirut next to some kid with purple hair next to some queer with AIDS right next to some dude who just got out of jail for the fourth time right next to some 20-year-old mom with four kids. It's depressing."

I loved the Colin Quinn joke from weekend update:

"...which goes to show, John Rocker has been on the 7 train."
This could be the first time a home team lynches one of its own players outside of Central America!

Also, just an asside for "Slap Shot" fans, the Ducks are also one of the hockey teams the Chiefs play.

"Hanrahan, your wife's a dyke!"
I really need to see that movie.
And the woman driving the vehicle was white. Which just goes to show you that no matter what race, ethnicity, or creed, they all have their share of bad women drivers.
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