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Monday, June 13, 2005

Tyson Actually done? I don't think so... 

Mike Tyson claims that he is going to retire from boxing after refusing to go back in for the 7th round against Kevin McBride. Sorry, Mike, but I just don't see it happening.

For one, he's still something like $20 million in debt. Had he either won this last fight or just stuck it out until the end, he would have netted a $5 million payday. He's still a drawing card, and this is the easiest way for him to earn money.

Second, he's still "only" 38. That used to be ancient in boxing years, but more and more we've seen heavyweights fight will into their geriatric years (Foreman, Holmes, etc.). Tyson was the champ once, and boxers will still want the opportunity to say that they took on the best, even if they are past their prime.

Now, Iron Mike may not want to get back into the ring with an actual boxer, but I have a solution to all of this: Remember that crappy celebrity boxing that was on FOX a few years ago? The biggest problem was who they got to fight. Does anyone really want to see Vanilla Ice get pummelled by Screech? Now, getting pounded by Tyson, on the other hand... who wouldn't want to see that?

Well I for one really do not want to see Tyson snywhere near a ring again! And yes, i'd rather see Screech pummel Vanilla Ice than see Tyson go into the ring with some palooka that he used to knock out with a harsh look and let him mop up the ring with his face. It's enough already! I's actually pay money NOT to watch him fight.
First, let me say that I'm not a boxing fan. That being established, I'd love to see Tyson embark on a take-on-all-comers world tour. You could pay $20,000 or so for the chance to fight Tyson. Or better yet, pay the 20 G's to have Tyson box an adversary. What a great birthday gift for your office manager. Every week, you could air a half-hour show about the guy Tyson's fighting with highlights from the fight at the end, Contender-style.

This I would watch.
As long as Manute Bol gets a shot. His fight with The Fridge was easily the most entertaining of the celebrity boxing matches.
See, Joe, you're kinda missing the point here. If either of us were rich, you know that one of us would put up 20 G's to see Aniel go toe to toe with Tyson.

As long as Aniel's dad was there to criticize him for being lazy the whole time. Like an anti-optimistic Mickey.
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